The exam result for the MOFA PSC came out last Friday on the website. My mother called me on Saturday to check it out and so I did. I had to install Myanmar2 keyboard layout to read the result and my heart was beating pretty fast as I was waiting for the installation to complete. I found my sister’s name but I didn’t see my name. Arr…another disappointment for me. I should have immediately listened to Antibiotic right away at the time but my mind was too occupied with the rejection. This is the second time I’ve been disappointed in 2 years, the first time with the trip to Korea thing and now this. I was rejected on the exam taken in 2005 but at that time I wasn’t really into it and I only took the exam ‘cuz of my parent’s encouragement.
Before I can stop myself, tears dropped from my eyes. I really hate it when it happens. I didn’t mean to cry but I’m such a weak person. Even though it was after office hours. people were still at the office and I couldn’t care about them. I even shouted at one guy who was just asking me to let him use my headphone.
I tried to calm myself by watching some videos, I think I watched Heroes Episode 1 but I lost interest. Finally I remembered to listen to Antibiotic and so I did and was surfing the web trying to focus on something and finally I found something to focus on. I came upon a live journal group for Joo Ji Hoon and found a tutorial to make icons. As I was making the icons, I can forget about what happened earlier. I was working on the second tutorial when I was asked to leave the office as they are closing it. Oh, darn, I didn’t get the chance to bring the tutorial home but at least I have an idea of how the colorization are done.
On my way home, it was really hard not to think about the exam result. I’m still not completely over it. What makes me really mad is that I spent all these hours studying while my sister was sleeping or reading novels and she still passed the exam for her second time. She didn’t pass the personal exam the last time. I hope she get the job this time. With her out of the picture, maybe I might get a better chance next time.
I know I suck in Myanmar Sar. A lot of people will just laugh when I say it but I really do suck at Myanmar Sar. My essay written in Myanmar are just terrible. I never got fully trained in how to write Myanmar essays. I only had experiences in English essays but my skills aren’t like it used to before as I have been out of touch with writing essays. I don’t want to blame my tutor but she kinda of ruined my skills when I was asked to stop writing in cursive and to write only one page for an essay. Ever since my 10th exam, my skills degraded. And my university teachers aren’t that much help either. They said the more you write, the more point you lose as those teachers who mark the papers had this strict code of 1 page per exam pinned to the brain.
I talked to my friend whose father work at MOFA. She said there might be another exam this year but I don’t think it’s possible. She’s already attending tuition so that she can prepare for herself. I’ll also need to prepare myself for the next round of exam. I can still take the exam until I turn 25. Now I’m 23, just 2 more months till June, and I still has my chance unlike my sister who’s going to turn 24 in May. I think I’ll apply for a course in translation at a monastery nearby. I heard that famous translators and editors came to teach at that place.