Self-Dependent

I had been involved in helping my student with her home assignment and I couldn’t understand why she was assigned to write about things not part of her curriculum. She had to write about systems like skeleton system, respiratory system, etc which she didn’t learn before. She has to write at least 6 systems and she didn’t know how to search for them on the internet. I don’t blame her ‘cuz I knew that she probably came across scientific terms that explain the specific details. My father has a couple of American textbooks which he got free from a library a long time ago and he kept them in case we need to look up something. I gave those books to her, hoping that she would read them ahead and work on her own. That day, I worked on finishing another Science report about simple machines with her. Simple Machines were already taught in her class so it should had been pretty easy and all she had to do was copy them right out from the two text books but still, she depended on me so I had to give her the instructions and what to copy down.

I returned the next day and spent three hours with her on the assignment. The job wasn’t easy ‘cuz I had to read back and forth between two books and picked out words and phrases suitable for her level. It would had been easier if she was interested in the assignment and helped me out but instead while I’m searching, she occupied herself with memorizing some paragraphs for English or something. Gosh, she doesn’t even know how to do paste and cut, let alone rewrite sentences. I must admit that I was no model student and I did most of my reports either doing paste and cut or rewriting them using other words. Nobody helped me with my homework and reports when I was back in school, I did them all on my own. Sure, you might say it’s because I was educated in America but the main thing was homework and reports were never too difficult for me except in English when I had to write essays on unfamiliar topics but even then, I managed them to get pass all of them.

I am really getting tired of this job. I didn’t bargain to be someone who tell her the correct answers and have her write them out but if I say do them on your own, she will say she doesn’t know how to do them. She doesn’t want to think at all. While I was working at the school, I used to regard her as the brightest student in the class ‘cuz she always got the correct answers. Now, I’m wondering if I’m ruining her. I only wanted to teach her by helping her understand things she didn’t understand and doing revisions over lessons that had been taught but my plan didn’t work out and now I had label myself as a homework helper.

A week ago, I took the entrance exam for the diploma course at UFL. If I passed the exam, I will be attending it on weekdays from 9:00 am to 3:20 pm. The time clashes with my morning class so I don’t know what will happen if I kept arriving late to class. After attending UFL, I think I might be too exhausted to teach her. I’ve started teaching two students for the weekends and if that work out well, I’m thinking of not teaching her anymore. I don’t want to ruin her anymore and I wanted her to become self-independent and do things on her own. Also, it doesn’t help with the fact that I am getting less money each month as some of the days were cancelled due to school trips and other school affairs.

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